just because its hilarious i’m writing this here. its not like i use names or anyone really read this who would know, BUT, T might have sucked R’s dick LOL. Thanks to scrawny griz for telling me that and making me giggle.

in other news. im terrible when it comes to attention from guys. i prefer to talk to guys and when i get that easy to talk to repor with them i love just being able to say anything with no real repercussion. For instance, with r, m, and j, i can basically say whatever i want and i know they arent gonna full out judge me or take offense from it. Now take a fake argumentative relationship like i have with RWH. It is also awesome because i’d never take anything legit from that. thats how i like to joke with everyone if i think they can take it. i dont care, fight back with it call me a whore, whatever. anyway. i recently had a similar deal with a guy i had recently met. it was awesome bc i was just being that argumentative friendly. nothing more nothing less. then he told me he liked me. gah. im not really feeling in the mood to have a guy. i dont know why because sometimes i really would love nothing more than to just snuggle in bed (now that the summer is coming however i’d prefer a blanket to not even touch me let alone a guy when im sleeping). anyway. i dont know how to address that since i always hate real legit feeling expression with people i dont really know.

bah humbug.

my birthday is coming up. i dont really know what to expect for it anymore. i have a little event on fb but its not like i think anyone is coming other than people i generally always see. nothing against them. in the slightest. but i dont wanna end up in the same places. and i would kinda like to go out to a place with music to boogie down to (omg im one of those girls sometimes?!?!). who knows whats gonna happen.

so charles’ funeral was fun and exciting for a few minor reasons. i finally got to see my cousin who ive not seen in AGES. ive also now met her fiance who is a great guy. his bday is 2 days before mine so they might come down to the city for that which would be cool. i got to meet one of my baby cousins who is like 7 months and absolutely adorable. saw one of my favorite people in my family bc hes so fucking adorable. hes 70+, about 5ft, really really pale. he had childhood schizophrenia so he cant cope on his own but my god hes adorable. he told mom that he gets upset that noone says goodbye to him so r and i went over to say hi. he was so excited and started talking about his meal that he got(which was the same thing i got) and he was really happy to tell us how much he liked the mashed potatoes and whatnot. when z first met him, J was sitting in a chair that his feet didnt reach the floor so they were just swinging haha. i love it. but they live at the end of the subway line so i am going to have to eventually visit them….. oof

now other than that the rest was kind of funeralish. stood around talking to random family/family friends. make random stupid conversation about what i am doing and pretend that im a lot happier than i actually am. see the pitiful older relative try to vie for everyones attention and get more and more like a child for everytime she is ignored. i felt terrible bc they had a priest come and talk (charles was not a religious man). i thought he was really far to preachy/theatrical with everything he was saying but its because he doesnt know the man how can you eulogize him? remind me to get close to a priest when my life starts to dwindle so my family doesnt have to go through that.

Im not sure how old he was but he is my great great uncle. he was a brilliant man that held many patents in his years as an engineer. He made sub engines quieter somehow…. i dont really recall seeing as how i saw these binders when i was MUCH younger and couldnt really decifer all the crazy maths. in his later years his mind certainly didnt die but his body did not seem to comply which frustrated him most. honestly i thought he was going to die 2 christmas’s ago because he was in the hospital muttering about how he wasnt aligned in the right magnetic fields and whatnot. for an hour dad and i sat in the new haven hospital with V. Only when we left and said good bye to him did he suddenly snap out of it and realize we were there. now he is actually gone. its just crazy. i remember him gardening. he had crops of tomatoes and cucumbers and had a constant battle with moles and the sandy soil. i remember him mowing the lawn with the push mower. and i realize how much 20 years affected him as opposed to me. while i got bigger and stronger he got older and weaker. his stature diminished and his skin paled. his eyes drooped and his voice creaked. but he still was there, hidden away behind the dropping skin and curving spine. his eyes sparkled whenever i spoke to him about graduating. and the day i told him that i was no longer in school for engineering was one of the days i felt most disappointed in myself because i feel like i had lost that connection with him. he never became less proud of me, but i just wish i had that ability to follow in his footsteps. sadly he had so many problems that he could not control. he was on medication for parkensons when he didnt have it, he was treated with unkindness in many hospices. he just wanted to be left alone but noone seemed to understand.

This life can only leave us lonely theres no tommorow
Just another little hole in my heart another little hole in my heart

Go to urbandictionary.com and type up the answer to each question, then write down the first definition.

1) Whats your first name? Erin

Erin is a female who has the body of a goddess and the brain of a genius. Men are drawn to her good looks and her awsome sense of humour. Out of all the females in the world its the Erins who rule.

guy: your just like Erin
girl: omg thats the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me

2) Your Age? 22

1) A .22 caliber handgun 2) Any rim that measures 22 inches in size 3) Slang term used for women to let you know they are prostitutes. 1) Don’t tote no 22’s 2) Magnum cost me 22, sat it on them 22’s 3) Lil mama super thick, she say she 22 (All examples from Rick Ross’ Hustlin)

3. One of your friends? Amanda

A women named Amanda is typically very beautiful with an incredible body and nice eyes. They are known to be very loveable. Amandas are envied by other women. 1. Damnnn, Amanda’s lookin’ fine today, as usual. 2. I wish I was Amanda, shes so pretty and nice!

4. Your favorite color? green

yes… it is most definitely referring to the marijuana… and also, upon occassion, any substance with similar uses. too, properly, of course, it is a golfing term, but that;s really not very much fun, now is it? ‘yo, where da green at?’

5. Homestate? New york

New York “Power that comes form diversity…. Pride that comes from making it to the top….” Nothing like the Big Apple

6. Month of your birthday? May

may is the month where teachers think that they can control a classroom but really nothing gets done and no one cares about their grades anymore. usually this happens because summer break is only 30 days away “hooray i have math…” “don’t worry bro, its may, nothing gets done anymore”

7. Favorite Sport? Foot ball (they are fun to watch )

When a girl is playing footsie with you, and her foot travels up to your crotch. She was playing football with me all through dinner.

8. Your last name? Bitch step off my name aint defined.

9. Year Born? 1986 ….. damn really?

10. Your favorite number?44

.44 Magnum firearm. My 44 make sure all yo’ kids don’t grow!

11. Name of town or city you are in? Bushwick

A neighborhood in Brooklyn’s northside that was once considered the worst neighborhood in America. He lives in Bushwick and takes the JMZ train home.

12. Zodiac sign? Taurus

1.Anybody born April 20 to May 20. Very friendly,sensual people who will be your best friend in bed and get easily pissed off if you rub them the wrong way. 2.

After I explained to Gina that she was a kangaroo. She lost her temper and told me that I was a piece of dog shit. Yep,she’s a Taurus all right!

so when they fired the MAs they promised me 40 hours a week. after a month or so, b and i were dropped down to 3 days a week and were told that it would be for the month of march. on the 1st, there was a meeting with the CEO who balls out told us that we cannot have a productive second quarter so we are taking a company wide furlong. Now im thinking ok they cant really do much else to our work week, they always need at least one of us around so they cant physically take any more of our days away. well they decided that they wouldnt take away days, just hours. so b and i now get to work from 9-2 on our respective days. which for me is 3 days a week and he works 2. however he has another job thankfully for him. Now for myself, i now have 3 days a week 5 hour days which equals, whats that 1st grade math? oh 5×3=15? yes class 15. 15 hours a week. now if you do the math of my hourly wage times 15 time 2 (bc it is biweekly) then take out the shithead taxes you get about 270-280 which means in a month i’d be getting about 550. which is shit. that doesnt even cover my base rent without utilities. that definitly doesnt cover eating and doesnt even begin to mention my alcohol intake.

to date i have applied for 10 jobs. It is sooo hard to deal with coverletters and resumes and whatnot. i need to fix stuff too…

My company will not do well this quarter. we have gotten the “talk” about how we all have to make sacrifices yadayada. thankfully they cant cut much more of my hours with bt. we already work 3 days a week. this segues nicely into the fact that i need another job. in about 2 weeks i will be done with my phlebotomy course and then i can try to get a second job. hopefully 2-3 days a week.  if i can bring in close to another 500 a week i’d be thrilled bc then i can not only continue eating but also drinking. and what is the city without drinking? currently i will be getting checks every 2 weeks which gives me…. just enough to cover rent if we dont have crazy bills for reasons unknown to me (which tends to happen more often than not!). so tonight marks my class being 1/3 over. just 8 more classes after this. WOOOO. and the 500$ that was put into this will be reimbursed rather quickly once i get a job *cross fingers*

anyway check out our new project!!  http://reallyreallythirsty.wordpress.com/

We think we are brilliant.

well this weekend i managed to only have 4 glasses of wine. one after coming home from wayyyy uptown to visit kc, who is pregnant and on bedrest until she gives birth, the following day i went to see mary poppins and i had 2 glasses while getting ready. today i had one to finish off the bottle i had opened so it wouldnt go bad.

anyway, mary poppins on broadway. wow. where do i begin. the sets were awesome. i really really liked bert. the children were good. the park scene was… interesting. the most memorable part of the show was a scene right before intermission where all of the childrens toys came alive to give the girl a trial bc she lost her temper and threw one of them. it was one of the scariest things i have scene in my life. there were toys and dolls and clowns (one with a snap braclet whip). kim and i were like wtfffffffffff. im not even scared of them normally but it really is a child’s worst nightmare. now for the scene i did actually enjoy was the park scene even though it was SO nothing like the movie other than it being in a park. there were statues that moved around and danced. some of which had some nice asses, just saying even kp’s mom thought so. the show was very cirque de soleil when mary’s play times happened. step in time was alright even though it is one of my fave scenes in the movie. i love tap dancing but the music was mostly so overpowering that you couldnt even hear the shoes. now to end on what i thought was the best part of the show, the scenes. it opens with a view of the house which is the father’s study, foyer, and living room downstairs with the stairwell going up from the foyer and ultimately leading to the childrens room in the attic. the roof is visible with 2 window/doors to the roof terrace. the children are sent upstairs with mary when she first arrives. the house is retracted and the bedroom decends from the roof section which gets pulled upward off stage. literally everyone in the audience gasped and said ooooooouuhh. which made kp and i laugh. thats about all i have to say about that.

after we went to starbucks where everyone drank coffee while i sat pretending to be happy to be there all while wanting to go drink heavily for about an hour. no such luck. kp told me her mom and grandma thought i looked very good which was nice since i never think i do.

So i know i have this blog to write things on, but you know when you just have topics that are just so juvenile and you know that you cant tell others because it is either something youve said before or you just think they will get annoyed with? Well every day i think of those topics that make me more girlie and obnoxious (i know because i think that of myself when im actually thinking about them). i just need them off my chest though. i cant keep them fluttering in my brain and once i have them somewhere else they dont seem like that big of a deal any more. either that or its like with harry potter and dumbledores little stone memory keeper. like that. shut up its a reference that makes this explanation easier.
anyway i have a diary thing now that i completely boring to read but its something. maybe one day i’ll get creative and start writing again.. prob not haha
ok i have like 20 minutes to getready to go out with ep and sc.

i finally signed up for a phlebotomy course! i was talking to bl and he was like don’t worry girl i got you, there will be a seat waiting, good thing i got all these connects. when they called me back they literally had ONLY one seat left in the next class. so three weeks, monday-thursday 6-9 i will be occupying a class to get a little diploma so i can perform phlebotomy in NY, CT, and NJ. that way i can prob get a job doing that on the weekends/days my present work wont fucking give me to work… watch by the time i finish they will give me 40 hours again. whatevs it will help my resume and my job search, which incidentally is shit since i either need 2 years experience (ive got since last july) or alot more certification/degrees. i need to finish up a year here. god please just let me get a year here!!!!

other than that ive not had anything really happen with me in the last day so I’ll talk about something random. i’ve finished reading Devil in a White City by Erik Larson which is about the Chicago’s world fair in the late 1800’s. It was called the White city in comparison to Chi-towns dark and menacing streets.

Also it was plaster and whitewashed. this fair was epic. in 26 months they constructed this amazing area, with huge buildings with heights that the world had yet to see. it brought many people to tears and brought people back time and time again, even with the exorbitant admission price of 50 cents. brilliant men and women were involved (even Walt Disneys father worked there which people believe helped to shape disney).

The previous world’s fair was in paris. Even today there is a very evident piece of it still surviving: the Effiel Tower. Now when Chicago got word that they could actual host the following fair (over the largest city New York) the lead architects knew that they had to “out effiel effiel.” they thought it wasnt going to be done but there was one man who had an idea, which was shot down multiple times until finally he got his chance. The man’s name was Ferris and he had invented a giant wheel that took passengers well over 200 feet into the air in trolleys that could fit over 30 people each (sadly it was sold as scrap after the fair was completed). It was the largest use of electric energy to date. They used elctric boats, outlined buildings in lights every night, and spotlighted the entire park.

Now since the title is Devil in the White City, you are lead to believe that there is a evil side story. It tells of a man that used the city’s allure to prey on youthful women who moved to chicago alone and very willing to leave their own chaperoned and quiet lifestyles in search of independence and adventure. However they met with Dr. H.H. Holmes (aka Herman Mudgett) who states in his confession years later: “I was born with the devil in me. I could not help the fact that I was a murderer, no more than the poet can help the inspiration to sing.”  At this time Jack the Ripper was loose in London, but instead of discovering dead prostitutes in various areas of the city, his victims’ disappearances went unnoticed or he lead family and police on wild goose chases with planned stories to various other countries.  His charm not only managed to persuade the doe eyed youths he killed but also men held in high regard in society.  He had made a lifestyle as a pharmacist and hotel manager, employing mostly vulnerable women coming from wealthy backgrounds, and when the World fair actual began he turned many men away from his hotel in order to keep the rooms filled with only women.  He constructed a “castle”  which contained various airtight rooms that had gas valves located in his personal quarters, a kiln that could heat to extreme temperatures, and that guests always said smelled of chemicals.  He would kill them passively, usually chloroformed or gassed. He enjoyed the power he had over them. He would then disect them and sell their skeletons to medical centers for learning. It is not known how many people he actual killed which is intriguing. He never fully confessed to everything but he was known to kill at least 3 children, their father and about 7 other women. Some believe the numbers were in hundreds.

anyway i really enjoyed the book a lot and even though i kinda exposed most of it, it is really interesting to read about if you are into historical events. Every quote in the book is actually from a historical document. It is just amazing that in 1893, with terrible soil, fires, colapsing buildings, storms off the lakes, and so many deaths, a city could be brought up and compel people to visit even as banks crumbled around them.

this weekend i spent wayyyy too much money. like woah what are you doing erin. 1st there was karens baby present which was 35 bucks. then 40$ for beerlympics, then 11 for a movie i think, then 30 at the scholar, then another 40 after beerlympics. that was in no chronological order. i didnt even factor in the minor things like food in this situation. jeez man jeez. so appearently i dont spend all that money during the week and i just mash it all into the weekends. oh plus st pattys was this week oh god thats another 30 for the bar crawl + tips, then like another 25 at the scholar plus food items. i should just die, i am so noto putting the atm cash in the right category in my financial pages. they dont need to know, its my life!

anyway beerlympics. sat we did that damn thing. first was hypothermia where one person had to keep their hands in a bucket of icewater while the other 5 teammates chugged full cups of beer. RWH was the iceman while the 5 girls of team vag chugged beer. the girl we had to just have around was really slow, i actually managed to do it so i didnt feel terrible about myself. then we had icefalls or something. we had to balence a full cup of ice and water on our heads while drinking half a cup of beer through a straw. only one hand could spot you if your teammates were nice. thankfully we were,  plus none of us even really needed saving!! yayyyyy!!! after that was beerpong. since it was going on a while we had to cut out dizzy bat which is a damn shame… not really so much, im glad i suggested to the guy we should skip that and move to flipcup. needless to say i got pretty nicely toasty. i feel like i should have been more so but it was like 630 and i shouldnt be wasted that early…. i shouldnt right?

then we went to pat’s and met with rc, jc, wr, th, JS, and hsomething. i met S and his lady, then his brother. im glad we met with people just because if i didnt have social interactions i was gonna have to go home and sleep.

it was a solid day of about 12 hours of drinking (second time in a week holla).

oh also saw I love you man. i really enjoyed it. it made me laugh but i dont really remember some of the great little jokes. Rudd was awesome segal was awesome (cept that cardigan according to RWH).